Vocation Confirmation

I had an Epiphany through Pinterest that had nothing to do with lace doilies, spray paint, low calorie cheese cake, or wedding table runners (per se…).

Last year, Sr. Lisa challenged me to examine my vocation and I did… kind of. Tony called me on my bull you-know-what, correctly so. I spent the next while asking a lot of questions I never wanted to fully explore.

Yes.

Truth be told, I didn’t want to be a nun. I had just celebrated my six-monthaversary with my wonderful beau and I was looking forward to teaching my kids to swim and make perfect rice krispie treats. The best I could do in terms of openness to God’s will was, “I want to want to do God’s will.”

So I wrote this, which almost tore me in half. My beau proved his worth to me and told me he wanted me to follow God’s will, too. We’ve prayed, I’ve prayed, I’ve only really discussed it with him and my sisters for fear of over-thinking instead of over-praying.

I knew what I wanted (marriage) and I was 99% positive I knew God was calling me to marriage. I told God, many times (often in frustration), to just confirm it, already.

Continue reading at Ignitum Today.

Crabcakes and Football

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*1*

Slow and steady wins back their blogging brain.

I have exciting news and I’m going to continue writing quick takes until I decide whether or not to tell you….go ahead and guess.

*2*

Have you listened to the Bright Maidens’ interview with Pat Gohn yet?

Click to listen to Part 2

In the first one we discussed a myriad of topics that we believe are important to Catholic young adults. In this, the second one, we spent a great deal of time talking about… sex. And virginity, and recycled virginity, and our identity as such.

It really turns into honest girl talk, so men, if you’ve ever wanted to be a fly on the wall of a sleepover, this is your chance.

*3*

Exciting news hint: it is one reason why I have been posting infrequently/not posting. Seriously, try to guess! #CathSorority girls aren’t allowed to guess.

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Click to buy it on Amazon

In the last week, I have listened to my church’s 1997 recording of our Song of Mark production at least 20 times. It’s a stellar musical and I highly recommend buying the CD and/or asking your music minister if they’d consider producing this play at your parish.

I know all of the people with lead roles, so I’m tempted to go to Mass on Monday and embarrass them with compliments about how I have their voices stuck in my head.

One of the children in the production who had a solo is one of my oldest friends and was 10 years old when her beautiful little voice sang the Good News. She now has a three-year-old girl and a month-old baby boy.

Time flies.

*5*

My cousin and her awesome boyfriend had a fun idea for a wedding present with a personal touch. Cousin’s-Awesome-Boyfriend salvaged and split a beautiful piece of wood, so that it has a flat surface for painting.

Selfishly, I’m eager to help them because it will help me get back into painting and creating art. They want me to paint a big crab on this, similar to the picture, and insert the words “Crabcakes and football: That’s what Maryland DOES!”

My canvas. Wood, I’m turning you into a crab.

What a creative wedding gift! I’m sure they’ll get a kick out of it. I’ll post some pictures of my progress later.

*6*

My exciting news will compel me to move to a different city. Bittersweet.

I decided I’d reveal my exciting news in its own post. So guess, guess, guess!

*7*

Don’t forget to join the Bright Maidens for this week’s topic on stay-at-home-moms and working-out-of-the-home moms.

In case you were wondering, we had this one planned before Lent began, so it’s a coincidence that the whole Ann Romney/Hilary Rosen thing blew up recently. You’re welcome to reflect on that, if you haven’t already, but that wasn’t our aim.

Trista’s post, “On Motherhood”
Lynsey’s post, “WOHM vs. SAHM”
Mandi’s post, “Stay at Home Mom vs. Working Mom”
Lisa’s post, “The Best Job in the World”

Basics

Back to blogging basics for me. The reason I began blogging a year and a half ago was because I needed a creative outlet in my life. I lost sight of that somewhere along the way and I let it translate to “burden” in my head. I’m going back to basics because I need to keep creativity in my life.

The burden came when I kept trying to analyze my life for my blog instead of … uh, living.

My eyes were too big for my stomach

Acceptable basics: God, family, food, water, shelter.

God

This weekend God made Himself clear through a whispering wind. My (not-feeling-well-because-this-year’s-cold/flu-is-a-beeyatch-and-sticks-around-for-three-weeks) beau and I spent an entire day doing NOTHING like a pair of 5-year-olds.

Sloth-y squirrel

Sloth? Maybe, but we also shook off all of the poop that we allow our daily lives to accumulate. We prayed, we napped, we watched TV shows we haven’t seen since the 90s, consequently giggled and shook our heads at 90s humor (Did I do that?), and READ BOOKS. It was a much-needed, extremely lazy Saturday. God helped us get our individual inner-children back into the picture.

Family

I spent Good Friday, Holy Saturday, and Easter Sunday with my wonderful family at the beach. Hmmm maybe I didn’t really need a lazy Saturday, after all. We goofed around, pretended we were all younger again, and walked on the beach. It was another back-to-basics weekend and perfectly timed to help me focus on God’s great sacrifice and Jesus’ resurrection.

My dad is always the photographer. YTBDITWWW

Food

During our lazy Saturday, my beau and I made THE MOST DELICIOUS lasagna that has ever existed. God had something to do with that, as well.

Mid-construction. Those are lasagna genius hands.

Email me, I’ll send you a piece.

Water

Christ in the Eucharist is the Lamb of God. Food that prevents us from hungering for eternity. His blood is the drink that saves us and quenches our thirst forever. Music, sometimes, can be like water for our soul, relieving a spiritual dry spell or a least cutting a path to God so that He may work in us. One of my very talented (I have two of ’em) sisters is a fantastic singer. She gives me chills and when I hear her, I’m transported back to a time when I would watch her determined face grab her way across the monkey bars, four feet off the ground, swinging her three foot body with every successful move forward.

This Sunday, I was the proud sister again as she quenched a Mass-full of worshipers with her beautiful voice as a cantor. I’m so grateful to God for giving her a talent that will always be a witness for others.

Shelter

Much of the time, I prefer being outside to being just about anywhere. Not all of the time. I’m not Annie Oakley, but I do love a good hike and some serotonin. 

I had to bring in some nature to calm me in my room/office. Also, some Jesus.

So, in honor of our actual anniversary (instead of the monthaversaries we’ve been celebrating), my beau and I will be enjoying a hike this week! I hope the weather cooperates by raining down like Niagra the day before our hike so the pollen loses this battle.

Give me this view, anyday

Oh, hello – 7QT, Volume 53

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Hello.

*2*

I discovered something about myself a few years ago. My passionate nature allows me to focus intensely on three things at one time. The fourth thing either bounces off my passion shield (Be gone, archery! We have no room for you here!) or schooches its way into my heart. 

Jesus’ yoke is easy and His burden is light.

Of course, said schooching fills me to the brim (I run full steam ahead with three passions) and one lonely item must leave the nest for a little while.

I think you know what lost out this time around.

*3*

Why?

1. Because my personal relationships started to get elbowed out because of number two…

2. I got a part-time job as a youth activities coordinator at my church. It was the tipping factor that indirectly asked me to bop out one of my intensities.

At first, I thought I could do it all. I was going to ORGANIZE myself into success. It’s a pipe dream I’m determined to fulfill, but for now the solution was to leave blogging out in the cold.

*4*

So youth ministry is completely different than I thought it would be! I have taught Theology of the Body to teens for almost two years now, but that requires so little prior preparation that I was fooled into thinking youth ministry was as carefree.

It’s invigorating and fulfilling, while poking dozens of tiny holes in my reality. I thought I was an organized person (and a psych test agrees… more on that later), but this job has made me realize I need to ENFORCE organization on myself. It doesn’t just take care of itself.

*5*

Coin Rubbage

One step in becoming more organized is also my next big piece of news: I’m moving out of my parents’ house! I moved into this house as a toddler and I’m moving out a month before my 25th birthday.

To those graduating in May:

Your decision to live at home depends entirely on your discernment and your parents’ willingness/insistence. The first thing anyone says when I tell them I “still live at home” is, “ALRIGHT, YOU’RE SMART!” accompanied by their fingers rubbing imaginary coins together in front of my face.

While, yes, I did save money (while paying a reduced rent), the best benefit of “staying at home” is precisely what you took for granted throughout your senior year of high school:

No one can quantify the value of coming home to people who love you. To wake up in a house where I brought home my first “A,” while my now-landlords clapped and squealed in excitement is invaluable to me. My wonderful parents and I reconnected as adults and I learned more from them in the last two, perspective-rich years than I did since that first homework assignment.

Thank you, Mommy and Daddy! I’m moving on to learn more, but I love the home you created between all of us.

*6*

My areas of interest. So I like art.

My full-time job provided me with the opportunity to take the Birkman assessment. Ask my family and my beau and they will tell you I can’t shut up about it.

Ask me and I tell you I’m enthusiastic about it because I’m a big picture thinker who likes to see how things work out with a plan.

It’s SO COOL to have a computer tell you, “Hey, you’re insightful, you like to work in smaller groups, but too much solitude is bad for you. When you’re stressed out, you will try to withdraw and procrastinate, so try to avoid that by setting up your environment with plenty of organization and time to complete your tasks.”

WHAT IS COOLER than seeing your habits and brain quantified? I think I talk about it exactly the right amount of time. Beau? Care to comment? 🙂

*7*

Bright Maidens announcement time!

We’re thinking about switching things up! This change would be reflected in the calendar (click the link, copy the URL, and use it to “subscribe” in your calendar application or format), so we’d like to hear what you think.

The topic that normally falls on a Tuesday will pertain to an entire week. Instead of asking you to write to a one-day deadline, we’re giving all of us a chance to wake up a little during the week.

If you have time to write your piece for Monday, have at it! If you want to explain why you think Gilbert Blythe is the ultimate man in 7 short bullet points, please, be our guest and wait until Friday!

I hate over-using the word “busy,” especially before I have children, so I won’t…. but it might be nice to inject a little flexibility into the week. What do you think?

Lime spelled backwards

One year ago today, the only grandfather I got to meet passed away in his home, after more than a year battling to get back to normal life, post-stroke. One of the things everyone often teased him about was his chronic tardiness. I think of him now, finally reunited with the grandmother I never met, who died when my mother was a toddler: “Good ol’ Emil. Always keeping me waiting!” I can hear her say.

In re-tribute, I’m reposting my tribute to him from last year:

My only grandfather passed away on Wednesday, early morning and we laid him to rest today. About two weeks ago, we checked him into the ER for pneumonia symptoms and found out he had lung cancer that had metastasized to his liver on the side that was paralyzed from his stroke a year ago.

My theory is that the paralyzed side hid a lot of the pain that he would have felt in what turned out to be late stages of cancer. PLUS he was a stubborn man who spoke of no pain, emotional or physical. You might think Chuck Norris and Jack Bauer are tough, but that’s because you never met Emil Daddy.

We called him Emil Daddy because he was a strapping, young 54-year-old when his eldest grandchild (ME!) was born — he didn’t want to feel old and he liked doing things his own way, so it was “Emil Daddy.”

If you’re as impeccably observant as my grandfather was, you’ve already noticed that his name is the backwards version of a tart, green citrus fruit. He came to EVERY Grandparents’ Day at each of his five grandchildren’s schools, bringing with him a bag of limes as a visual teaching tool.

“You’ll always remember how to spell it because it’s lime, L-I-M-E, spelled backwards,” he said to a crowd of open mouthed elementary school kids sitting Indian style on the rug.

He was always a big hit and my sister says she has a friend who asked her last year, “You’re the one with the grandfather with the limes, right?”

My Emil Daddy lost his young wife when my mom and her sister were 2 and 3-years-old. I was talking to a friend and cousin the day he died and she exclaimed about how she didn’t know any man who is ready to get married at the age he was on his wedding day, let alone who is able to raise two girls. Those girls grew into extremely successful women with college degrees, a nursing degree for one and an engineering masters degree for the other, and kicking families, if I do say so myself.

Throughout all of Emil Daddy’s own book of Job, he remained steadfast in the Lord. It was really something to admire. His faith was consistent and strong, even when it would have been easier to get mad and give up.

In his daily life, Emil Daddy was extremely organized. I cannot begin to explain just what I mean by “extremely” because you have never met someone so efficient and particular. He saved every used peanut butter jar to store something, he separated black pens, blue pens, and red pens, he rewrote the user manuals for his computer in notebooks, cross-referencing them in other notebooks (using color coordination), so he would absolutely know where to go when he had a question.

I’m on the left. Chubby little hand, huh?

I could write for hours about the little quirks and memories I have of this stoic yet sacrificing and giving man. In fact, I’m working on a novel that will explain the love story between Emil Daddy and his wife, Thelma. Sneak preview: we have a few pages of 12-year-old Emil handwriting explaining how he was in love with a girl in his class, Thelma, and how he wanted to marry her. It only took ten years, I guess.

Thank you, Lord, for bringing me into the world under the care of my grandfather, Emil. I will continue to learn from the imprint he left on my life.

Thank you for your prayers and your time in reading this. God bless you all and Merry Christmas!

Sneak preview

Sister, dad, mom, sister, me.

Souls in a storm

I’ll hang on to my excuses over my missing Bright Maidens post and my absence for now…. several months ago Michelle from Catholic Unveiled asked me to help her fill some space on her blog while she served others with her big heart in Mexico. Here is my contribution that she published today:

On December 22, 2010, I woke up to one of the worst phone calls that I have ever received.On April 10 of this year I woke up feeling like someone was tugging on my throat and swinging from it like it tolled the bell in a tower. I knew she had left us.

I’ve become very familiar with funerals, the abundance of food, and handshakes over the last nine months. My great aunt died unexpectedly in November (four days before Thanksgiving), my maternal grandfather died a month later (three days before Christmas), and my paternal grandmother died a week before Palm Sunday.

An additional handful of friends and family have died since last November, placing me and my family in nine funeral Masses during the last nine months.

Someone who has to repeat outfits at the funeral home cannot easily avoid the big questions about what he or she believes about souls and life after Earth. Our logical, rational mind can get bogged down for the quest for answers to this question.

Logic and rationale are beautiful gifts of the mind; they are often helpful and the means by which we discover Truth. However, we can’t forget to think about where the rubber meets the road, especially when this vehicle is carrying a full load of grief and fear.

We are the Church, members of the Communion of Saints. When Christ conquered death and resurrected, He unified the Church beyond the weakened lines of Earthly death.

The readings for August 7 highlighted this bond and exemplifies the attendance of God in every part of our lives.

In moments of weakness, I catch myself assuming that God was only truly present with the prophets, among the Apostles, and the first disciples. Elijah had a direct telephone line to God, Moses saw Him several times, the Twelve followed Him around for three years, and then saw Him in the Upper Room after His death.

Of course they believed, I rant, their faith grew daily in His strong, factual presence.

We don’t get that luxury, I think in my self-pitying mindset. We just have to believe God cares enough to pull us out of the storm when we fall below the water’s surface.

“A strong and heavy wind was rending the mountains and crushing rocks before the LORD— but the LORD was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake— but the LORD was not in the earthquake. After the earthquake there was fire— but the LORD was not in the fire. After the fire there was a tiny whispering sound. When he heard this, Elijah hid his face in his cloak and went and stood at the entrance of the cave.” -1 Kings 19:11-13

God came to Elijah in the calm.

Read more….

Like Pulling Snowman Teeth – 7QT, Volume 51

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I didn’t post for Thanksgiving A) because I was enjoying time with my family and B) I prayed all of you were enjoying your Thanksgiving instead of reading blogs!

So……… I enjoyed time with my cousins, the Twinsies, and the rest of my family. They are almost a year old! I can’t believe it. I have a sliver of the feeling that I would feel if I was their mother, I’m sure.

*2*

Cyber Monday came and went without a penny spent by me. *Pats self on back*

I hear the best deals come later anyway. Plus, do I really need anything else?

(Check out Decide.com if you’re considering buying some electronics or gadgets.)

Though I constantly resist the sales, I’m still enticed by some really delicious feeling of spending money, even though I HATE SPENDING MONEY.

I wrote this quick take on Wednesday… and Thursday I went on a Target.com spree… sigh.

*3*

How do you feel about the Victoria’s Secret show? I never had a very strong opinion about it, but it occurred to me that I probably should…

My short opinion: yes, they are objectifying women. Absolutely, though the women choose to and even DREAM of walking down that catwalk. They also dress it up with the fanciful, costume atmosphere that the fashion world is famous for.

Therefore, no, it’s not as bad as porn, but the subtlety allows more of the negative messages that discredit TOB to sneak by, under the guise of a carnival show.

Victorian Secret fashion show

*4*

Liesl introduced me to 1000 Awesome Things, such as when the first person starts the standing ovation. That person, if you look around next time you’re at a performance, is usually my father or my sister. I admire them for that because, unfortunately, I don’t think that will ever be me.

Check out their books for a dose of positivity in your Christmas shopping:

The Book of (Holiday) Awesome
The Book of Awesome

*5*

One thing I really love about my beau is also something that attracts a lot of playful teasing from my family and friends.

A cruel little game my family (and I) play is to name a movie, any movie, hoping to nail one of the 14 movies he’s seen (I’m kidding, my love 🙂 ). He’s seen more than 14, but probably less than 80.

Again, I love this about him. He spent his childhood DOING things instead of watching movies. He is an expert on almost everything handy or crafty (seriously, everything). I learn something new every single day and without the time to learn all of that, he wouldn’t be able to teach me the quirky, genius ways to fix things.

Plus, now we have the chance to watch some of my favorite movies together, should he wish to watch them.

He’s putting in surround sound in his living room so we can enjoy some movies together. 🙂

I still prefer our hiking and travel outing most of all.

*6*

I just watched Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer and …. the first thing I thought of when the Dentist took out the teeth of the Abominable Snowman was, “Eugenics!”

As we know, the delightful founder of Planned Parenthood, Margaret Sanger, was a strong voice in the eugenics movement. She advocated for birth control and sterilization to clean up the human race (taking out the “mentally inferior” and black), treating fertility like a disease.

Now here we have this gigantic, fearsome (misunderstood?) monster whose unappealing feature is his man-and-reindeer appetite and accompanying teeth. Pop, pop, pop. Get those things out of there. Presto-chango, he’s tame and puts stars on your 15 ft. Christmas trees at the end of a leash.

Are you picking up what I’m putting down? To clarify: I’m not accusing the writer of Rudolph of supporting eugenics, nor am I belittling serializing to removing a monster’s teeth.

*7*

Do you think Santa picked up a Canadian accent up there?

One Year of JML Love

Today is the one year anniversary of the unexpected passing of one of my grandparent figures. She was a wonderful, giving woman in every sense of the word. My family celebrated her life this morning at Mass, putting us in communion with her and the rest of the Communion of Saints.


Thank you, God, for putting her in the lives of my mom, my aunt, her husband, her children, her daughters-in-law, the grandchild she got to hold and the twin grandchildren who will learn about her throughout their lives.


In memory, I’m re-posting the eulogy I gave in her honor a year ago (For those who have never heard the Richmond accent, “Hello there” is pronounced <<Hello, they-yah>> and she was famous for it):

Hello they-yah.

One of the most consistent memories I have of Joan Marie was that she was always very well put together. She always had a fun jacket or sweater, perfectly matched shoes, and a fresh face of make-up. I remember that every time I hugged her, I felt a little foundation rub off onto my cheek.

Now, I think I was in 6th grade when I finally grew taller than her, so it was the little ritual I will always remember: first, she’d say “Hello they-yah Elizabuth,” Second, bend down, but not until the last second, so as not to look like I was about to hug a 10 year old. Third, accept the warm kiss on my cheek and feel the slick spot of foundation on my cheekbone. Just like I could feel that little spot on my cheek, we all feel the direct and indirect “rub offs” that Joan left on each of us.

Joan Marie and the house she decorated WERE CHRISTMAS. She used to tickle my dad into submission. Laura and Chris always mentioned each time they received a gift, which was always perfectly wrapped, on time, and ideal for that person, it would most likely be green. My freshman year of college, she IM’d me. My 65 year old Great Aunt IM’d me! I’m sure Michael Jr will testify that she was the coolest Mimi around and he’ll get to tell his new cousins all about her.

Joan lived the faith and didn’t ask for credit. Obviously Matthew 6 was stamped right on her heart. She probably dropped off meals at peoples’ houses who, to this day, do not know from whom they came.

This philosophy spilled over, in abundance, to her life with Saint Gertrude High School. I never knew how involved in Saint Gertrude she was until I was pleasantly surprised to run into her at a class correspondents’ meeting earlier this fall. Gerties love their committees, I think I sit on 3 of them and I’m sure she sat on 30 or more since she graduated. There she was at her alma mater for what was likely her 1000th meeting to discuss Alumnae relations, chatting up some ladies from her Gertie era. She was the popular kid!

When I offered to talk about Joan, Johnny asked me not to be too soupy. So let me see: ham biscuits, broccoli casserole, corn pudding, Peecahn PAHI.

Let’s just agree, the essence of Joan Marie is: Joy. And it’s our job to keep that joy going.

DIY in pitchas, 7QT, Volume 49

Click here to read the original post at ConversionDiary.com *1*  Truly quick quick takes: The fun DIYs I’ve discovered recently, in pictures! This lovely lady made her wedding dress out of vintage curtains! *2* Homemade laundry detergent: $6.00 for 576 loads. Uh, yes please. *3* DIY decoupage, just in time for Christmas crafting! *4* Step-by-step how to install under-the-sink shelves. It’s enough to make me want to clean… *5* Closet dividers made from old CDs. Wow, this is like chocolate for my OCD palette. Not only do I have a use for those old CDs, but I can organize my closet again and again! *6* Want the light in the background of a depth-of-field photo to appear in shapes? DIY it! For the non-photogs out there, the contraption that makes this possible is called a bokeh. *7* Vinegar runs at about $1 for a gallon. That squashes any competition for chemical cleaners and now you have a list of 45 uses for the cheaper alternative. No brainer, PLUS you can pretend you are your grandmother as you clean everything you can find with vinegar.